Yeah, I’ve had a handful of pints. What can I say? There’s MLS action on the tele! Plus, a wise man once said, “write drunk, edit sober.” Anyway, rather than an in depth MLS season preview, here’s a team by team list of things I’ll be watching for in 2017:

soccer-therapy-mls-druken-preview-2017 ATL United: It’s never easy for expansion teams in any sport, and MLS is no different. But Atlanta seem positioned to maybe do a little damage in their first season.

Chicago Fire: It’s been dark days, weeks, months and years for the Fire now. Is there finally reason to believe it’s being turned around for good? The club brass are committed to the current regime and some offseason moves (Dax McCarty from NYRB stands out) are decent starting points.

Colorado Rapids: Can they match 2016’s regular season success and improve on a solid postseason performance? The roster remains largely unchanged, and Timmy Howard is a flat out beast in this league. For some reason, though, I suspect the Rapids take a step back this season and struggle for a wild card spot in the ever difficult western conference.

Tim Howard could take ‘Keeper of the Year honors in 2017.

Columbus Crew: Perhaps the opposite of Colorado in that 2016 was not a charmed year for the Crew. Many in the media are predicting a turnaround in 2017, but I’ll believe it when I see it.

DC United: Ben Olsen has been on the hot seat once or twice during his time at DC United. What does the front office expect this season for him to keep his job? Honest question, I really don’t know.

FC Dallas: The Hoops lost Fabian Castillo to the Turkish League in 2016. They lost youth academy gem Weston McKinnie to Bundesliga side Schalke as well. Kellyn Acosta, Carlos Gruezo and Mauro Diaz are talented young studs that may soon desire a move overseas. How long can this classy club hang onto the players that helped it triple the size of its trophy case in 2016?

Houston: It’s been a tough stretch for a proud club. Everything they touch turns the opposite of gold these days. The good news for Dynamo fans is that ownership seems committed to turning the club around. We’ll see if Houston can put a foot in the right direction in 2017, that’s all one can ask for.

LA Galaxy: Bruce is out (bad thing) – we’ll see if the fella in the image below can hang, but it’s so tough replacing a legend. Keane (bad thing) and Gerrard (not a bad thing) are out too. How the Galaxy perform in 2017 is anyone’s guess. Despite that, it’s no surprise they’re among the favorites to win MLS Cup, coming in around 6-1 on most sites.

la-galaxy-coach

MN United: I find the Loons to be a fairly unintriguing club for an expansion side, and that’s all I have to say about that. Good lookin’ kits though.

Montreal: The Impact are coming off a marvelous year, making a legitimate push for an MLS Cup appearance before falling short against star studded TFC. Perhaps they can improve in 2017 with an improved focus sans Drogba.

Among the very best players in MLS, Nacho Piatti is an MVP candidate in 2017.

NE Revolution: A tough club to read year in year out, but I like the continuity they have coming into 2017, and I suspect with their firepower they’ll fight for one of those coveted top 2 spots in the east (provided Lee Nguyen stays healthy). But when will this charter club ever get a decent home to play in?

NYCFC: Frank Lampard is out and Maxi Moralez is in, a DP signing that’s been praised by some of my favorite soccer media people. New York have resources and young talent which, in theory, means their roster will improve this season. What to watch for this year? Will reigning MVP David Villa ever regress? It’s surprising to see this club among the Vegas favorites to win MLS Cup, can they make a push?

NYRB: More disappointment for this club in a knockout stage, losing to Vancouver in the CCL semis this week. How will the Red Bulls manage in the wake of the McCarty loss? Can BWP keep up his unprecedented goal-scoring pace in MLS play?

Orlando: Jason Kreis has had a full offseason. Hopefully management gives him some time, because it’s difficult for me to envision a positive 2017 for this club. The new stadium (rendering below) looks absolutely amazing, though. Orlando and its fans have been a shining beacon for this league and the viability of its expansion efforts.
Image result for orlando city soccer new stadium

Philly: Don’t know, don’t care? Sorry…. here’s a hyperlink to the club’s webpage.

Portland: The Timbers have been tough to get a read on under coach Caleb Porter, but I imagine they’ll compete for trophies in 2017 if the key contributors stay healthy. What to watch for? Can this club manage any points on the road this season? If so, they could rightly challenge for their first Supporters’ Shield.

Real Salt Lake: RSL find themselves in a tough spot. I still don’t think anyone knows how viable Jeff Cassar really is at head coach. Plus, the roster is built around aging veterans and injury-prone youngsters. The club seems to be stuck in neutral, but can the dynamic Joao Plata stay healthy this season and shift the club into “drive?”

San Jose: Are San Jose the Philly of the west? I find this club very boring. Will Tommy Thompson ever have his breakout season?

Seattle: Classic Sounders: they injure FCD’s Mauro Diaz (best player on the best team in MLS) in the dying moments of the regular season’s penultimate match. Seattle then defeats Dallas in the western conference semis en route to their chicken sh*t title (no shots on goal in the MLS Cup Final match, which they won on PKs). The club really struggled last spring and summer, but struck gold signing Nico Lodeiro in the transfer window and then capitalized on a weakened field come autumn. With Dempsey coming back, they’ll be dangerous from the get-go in 2017. Is Brian Schmetzer a good coach?

Sporting KC: Can Sporting make it out of this current run of mediocrity? I like Vermes, but it’s hard to envision this club competing for much beyond a USOC title in 2017.

Toronto FC: The Reds removed quite a few monkeys from their backs in 2016, making it all the way to MLS Cup before falling short against an undeserving Seattle side. I’ll be looking for Toronto to assert themselves as the favorites in the east in 2017, but this club still has a long history of disappointment to overcome despite last year’s success.

Vancouver: Brek Shea up top? Can Pedro Morales recapture his form of 2014? They’re in the CCL semis, but before we write them off against current tourney favorites Tigres, remember the magic of Montreal in 2015. Oh, and Freddy Montero (below) is back baby!

Image result for fredy montero

Individual Awards:

Landon Donovan MVP: Sebastian Giovinco (TFC)… for what should be 3 straight
GK of the Year: Tim Howard (Colorado)
Golden Boot Winner: Fanendo Adi, 19 Goals (Portland)
Coach of the Year: Wilmer Cabrera (Houston)
Defender of the Year: Walker Zimmerman (FC Dallas)
Newcomer of the Year: Sebastian Blanco (Portland)